Why Eye Contact Matters in Your Relationship

Eye contact has undeniable power. Many studies show that eye contact can help build a stronger, deeper connection between partners. It strengthens relationships and increases intimacy. A study found that as we make eye contact, oxytocin (the “love hormone”) is released.

Why is Making Eye Contact Challenging?

There are several reasons why people have difficulty making or maintaining eye contact. People with social anxiety disorders often have low esteem and often have an extreme fear of being judged and struggle to make eye contact. Couples often avoid looking into each other’s eyes after a tiff. In many cases, people avoid eye contact with their partners when they are nervous about sharing bad news with them.

Different Types of Eye Contact

There are different categories of eye contact. Intentional lack of eye contact can indicate a festering relationship problem that should be resolved at the earliest opportunity. Partners often unintentionally avoid eye contact when their mind is somewhere else.

Both accidental and conscious glances can indicate attraction. Intense eye contact signals a strong bond and attraction. Lingering glances occur between couples during conversations and suggest that they really connect with each other.

How Can Eye Contact Help Improve Your Relationship?

Eye contact leads to engagement. Looking into your partner’s eyes during conversations is a great way to make them feel heard, show them you care, and express your love.

On the contrary, if you avoid eye contact during conversations, your partner may begin to feel ignored and may drift apart from you.

Eye contact helps build intimacy in your relationship. When you look into your partner’s eyes and share their feelings and emotions, you connect with them on an emotional level. It’s essential for bonding and keeps the attraction alive over time.

Contact Exercises to Strengthen Your Relationship

Sit across from your partner. Set a timer for an agreed-upon period of time and try to do nothing else but look into each other’s eyes. Try to feel what your partner is feeling. This exercise can help deepen your relationship and evoke a wide range of positive emotions.

Make sure that you really look into your partner’s eyes while talking to them. Before striking up a conversation, remind yourself to make eye contact throughout. This way you won’t miss any important piece of information and can understand their feelings.

Research suggests that the human brain lived for 15 seconds in the past, meaning it showed us images from 15 seconds in the past. Look at your partner every 20-30 seconds or you may miss their reaction when you say something and your brain may continue to rely on old visual information.

Struggling to keep the spark alive in your relationship? Let Cooper Mental Health Counseling help. We offer couples counseling in Manhattan where our team helps couples find and address issues to build strong relationships. To talk to any of our therapists, call (347) 244-7873.